Save the Boys Initiative

My heart bleeds each day with different stories of men who are terribly broken due to the ripple effect of sexual abuse. A lot are deeply struggling with wild range of unquenchable sexual desire as a result of this scar. I am pained to see our women and girls suffering severe abuse, violence and rape from these broken men. Boys are one of the most sexually abused sets of people but since they are boys, have a penis and look stronge r, nobody believes them, no one feels it damages them. They think we enjoy it. So many men today are sex addicts simply because they started experiencing sexual pleasures from a very tender age of 4-9 years by older ladies, aunties, sister's friends, older neighbours, maids and even school teachers who got them involved in sexual activities, and as a result making them addicts and sex freaks. They are emotionally damaged to the point that they hardly recognize themselves as they sleep around. Some men now hate sex or prefer men to women. We call ...

Boys’ self-confidence is also at risk because of gender stereotypes, which leave them, too, feeling inadequate when they believe they don’t meet expectations, and gives them few outlets to express their feelings. “There’s this myth that boys don’t have as many feelings or they’re not as emotional,” says Rachel Busman, PsyD, a senior clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. “These are misperceptions. We need to be more nurturing of our boys, as well.”

I grew up in the church and had Christian morals. At a very tender age, we had a neighbour who was a very close friend of mine. When our parents were out, we would always play together; acting drama, touching ourselves carelessly, acting sex in the drama. Being both boys we enjoyed it but we didn't know what we were doing and where we were quietly heading to. We never thought it will have any negative effect on us when we grow up. This continued for a while and at age 12, I discovered that I started having feelings for same-sex and I just couldn't love a lady.  I tried severally but it just didn't work out. As time passed, I started getting irresistible sexual advances from my barbers and mother's driver. It started getting complicated for me. As a result, I became an angry and aggressive boy. I began to sexually molest other boys. I stayed in this mess and suffered the trauma for 12 years until finally I opened up, spoke to someone in the fellowship who c...

Let us teach the boychild that; * Find someone you can trust and talk to when you have a challenge. *Don't listen to those who say men don't cry. Cry out if and when you are in need of help. Not everyone will call you a stubborn or bad boy. Someone will listen to you, put himself/herself in your shoes, understand you and advise you. * The feeling you are having as an adolescent is natural and normal. Control yourself and don't go raping or harassing girls when your body is misbehaving. That may take you to jail and waste your life. * Take responsibility for your actions. Having sex at a young age is wrong but if you do and impregnate your fellow school mate or girl at your age, do not neglect her to go through all the humiliation and suffering all by herself. * Do not go having sex when you are not ready to take responsibility. * As you grow up and have a wife and/or father children, take responsibility and never neglect your children as you surely re...

 Many times we see groups, NGOs talk for and about the GirlChild. We hardly ever hear any talk about the BoyChild. This is not to say that there is anything wrong with talking for and seeking the wellbeing of our girls, admitted, girls are more vulnerable. But aren't our boys equally vulnerable? It's about time we pay equal attention to the BoyChild as well. Growing up as a young girl in a town called Mamponteng in the Ashanti Region, I seemed to be more enlightened than children of my age in that part of the world. I was very observant, clever (at least that's what I heard some adult say about me many times), assertive and Godfearing. I was one of the favourite little girls in the Catholic church there. I took part in almost every church activity. In fact, I was the first child to be part of the adults' choir. I remember returning home from church with gifts especially cash almost always. My little brother on the other hand who was seen as 'stubborn...

Dear Parents,  You've home trained the girl child very well. You've inculcated good habits in them. You've groomed them well. They are focused and are excelling. They are been adequately prepared for marriage.  Thank you.  Now can you please turn and face the boys. I don't know the kind of men we are raising these days.  Tell your boys they won't die if they pick their plates and wash them after eating.  Tell them they won't suffer stroke if they sweep and mop the house.  Teach them how to cook too, it won't reduce their manhood.  Tell them they won't have hypertension if their rooms are kept clean. Tell them it is not a bad thing for them to wash their clothes.  Tell them their skin won't peel off if they bathe at least twice daily and their teeth won't fall off if they brush at least twice daily!  Tell them it is decent to wash their boxers once or twice after using them! Tell them it ...

The Senate has taken the second reading of a bill seeking to remove gender restrictions in the offence of rape and related matters. If passed, the bill will formally recognise men as victims of rape as applicable. The bill also seeks to remove the statute of limitation on defilement, while it also seeks increased punishment for kidnapping.  Introduced by Senator Oluremi Tinubu (APC-‎Lagos Central) at the Senate plenary on Tuesday, the SB2 is “A Bill for an Act to amend the Criminal Code Act CAP C38 LFN 2004 to delete the Statute of Limitation on defilement, increase in punishment for the offences of kidnapping, remove gender restrictions in the offence of rape and for related matters, 2019 (SB. 2).” This is highly commendable and we pray for a smooth process in the passage of this bill into law. Our boys need help too and the protection. Save the Boys Initiative